Home is where the Cat is.

Missionary work is scary business.

House 1: No one.

House 2: His mom.

House 3: No one.

House 4: A little sister who can’t convince the older sisters to come to the door even though we know they’re home.

….etc…

House 98: His mom. And a CAT!!! I hate cats. But Annabelle is the one who has a reason not to like this particular cat because it has been trained to attack her. We had to be brave.

Later we found out why no one answered their doors. It’s because they were all Christmas shopping. The. Lines. Were. So. LONG. We hate parking lots and pedestrians and the sun and everyone who thinks the world is ending today. Apparently not everyone believes that the world is over, though, because they were crowding the stores and the streets to find Christmas paraphernalia.

If you would like some advice, Annabelle and Rita have two things we’ve learned from our good and bad experiences today.

1. Don’t procrastinate the day of your Christmas shopping.
2. Call, don’t text.

Work on those two things and if you get discouraged, look at the bright side. At least we are not stoplights.

Well.

Rita inspired me. She's been filling you in on our life lately, and I decided it was my turn. Rita and I have busy, crazy lives. Somedays we climb mountains just to learn about science. Whose idea was that Rita??? NOBODY knows why you are taking Physics. Clearly, that was a silly silly choice.
ANYWAY.
It seems that Rita and I have a dilemma. We're much to comfortable with our own 'super cool' these days that we have a hard time finding everyone else's. AKA we have no friends. This makes life an awkward situation. Lunchtime makes life an EVEN MORE awkward situation. Our school is so large and we are so small that sometimes we can't find each other at lunch. And then when we do find each other, it's like we have been walking through the desert for the past 7 years searching for each other.
The other day, I couldn't find Rita. I decided to be bold and stand in the lunch line to someone I didn't know. "What's your name?" I asked. I received a funny look from the young man.
"Uh...Caesar." Was his reply.
"Hi Caesar! I'm Annabelle! It's nice to meet you! I'm so excited to have lunch! I can't wait to buy--" it was at that moment that I realized that I was in the wrong lunch line. I did NOT want to eat pizza, I wanted to eat a salad (not because I think I'm fat). "--um..I'm in the wrong lunch line....I'll just umm...well..it was nice to meet you. Bye!"
I'm a dork. Lunch is hard.
On days when Rita and I do find each other, we just sit and read or do homework or sometimes even wander up to the library and try to find good music on grooveshark.

Enemy of the average, super cool....yeah. We're still in training. Bear (bare? beahr? behr? WHATEVER) with us world.

True Celebrities

Josh and Chuck. The real celebrities here.

Friday night. Partyin' partyin', right? Not quite. While Annabelle sang with William Joseph, I read about Isaac Newton and his laws. YOLO, so please remind me why I'm taking physics. For the record, Isaac Newton has 13,000,000 results on Google and William Joseph has 86,500,000. Fine. I shouldn't jump to conclusions. I would like to publicly apologize to William Joseph for underestimating his fame. Although, I'm starting to think that Google isn't a good judge because Josh Clark and Charles W. (Chuck) Bryant only have 1,210,000 results and they are by far my favorite celebrities/historical figures. I'm going to send them a letter before the school year ends. I'm very grateful for their impact on the world. I really wish I could write articles for howstuffworks.com instead of trying to decide what I want to major in next year. Why can't I just learn about everything?

I LOVE Carl Fredrickson!

So Friday night wasn't that cool. But there are still days when Annabelle and Rita get to have adventures and do some stalking. Monday, for example, was a fabulous day. We went to see a play in Wolverineland because our friend, Carl Fredrickson, invited us.We were frantically trying to find the stage in the mazes of Wolverineland when we ran into young man I recognized. Mr. Enthusiastic. It was serendipity. He told us that the show had just ended. At first I was disappointed, but it ended up being a better day than I expected. Carl Fredrickson thinks we came to his show, I was reunited with my long lost friend, Mr. Enthusiastic, and we saved $3 by not watching a tragic play. The best part is, there was an escaped convict who ran across the stage during the show. We saw him pinned to the ground behind the dressing room, surrounded by police cars. We also met some ducks and an inappropriate statue. Annabelle and I got Frosty's and talked about everything from texting boys to dry elbows. We decided we want to be more like Mr. Enthusiastic. By the way, Mr. Enthusiastic is going to Germany on a two year Buddhist excursion. Put a little black name tag on that green bathrobe and share your enthusiasm with the world!

Life is good.  We are enemies of the average and yet the only normal people in the world. Annabelle introduced me to Frank Sinatra radio. I invited her to join the SYSK army. Explications are done. Annabelle is ignoring her conscience and running from the devil reincarnate. Guess where we will be next week?

--Rita

Finding the Super Cool in Everyone

"I just can't decide if he's super cool or super weird."

I think I already knew that everyone has a Super Weird side. We've been discussing normalcy recently and taking long tests that are supposed to give you a normal score...or something. According to the internet, Annabelle is twice as normal as I am. Fine. If you ask me, neurotypical people don't exist. At least, I haven't met any. If you consider yourself normal, please leave a comment. I'd love to meet you.

Today, Annabelle's question concerning a specific person was answered and the verdict was unanimous. Super cool. I'm embarrassed to say it took me longer than Annabelle to come to that conclusion. I've learned that I should take the time to get to know people better. Find the Super Cool in everyone. In Annabelle's words, "What's your Super Cool?"

Gangs

Rita and I have a gang. It is a biker gang. And we are pretty rugged material. Let's just say...you DON'T want to rub us the wrong way, okay?
Yesterday we decided to cruise around town for awhile. We decided to go intimidate our rival gang with our bikes. We had them surrounded.

Josephine and Gladys enjoyed our little outing. Unfortunately, Josephine had a hard time when we got to the park. She was a little...undone. It was pouring rain and Rita and I were in despair. We spotted a few....friends that could have helped us..but we didn't want to disturb their date.
Desperate, we called a member of the rival gang to come help us. They got us up and running in no time.

Rita writes better posts than me....
Give me a few days...I'll have a good one.
--Annabelle

While Annabelle is On a Tour Bus Without Boys

Dear Annabelle,

It’s Tuesday. I hope your bus doesn’t break down for four hours. I hope you have air conditioning. I hope you have plenty of ice and that you practice your synchronized swimming routine on the way there.

            I only watched ¾ of our favorite movie before I couldn’t handle any more without you. I went for a hike this morning and scouted out flat, paved trails where we can have bike gang hangouts. I don’t know about your bike, but Gladys (yes, I named her after a bike in a book, don’t make fun of me) doesn’t really like big hills. Don’t worry, I found some Gladys accessible trails and I can’t wait for you to get home so we can begin this adventure. While I was there I was also careful to observe the graffiti gang symbols everywhere. We need one of our own. Drugs are too cliché and someone even used an Egyptian eye. We’ll have to get creative. Something that represents us… a cupcake?...a butterfly?...we’ll consult later and figure it out.

This one's really nice.

            Now it’s time for one of my favorite games. Our readers deserve an update, but since our sole reader lives in Germany, I thought I’d use Google translate to help us. Then (for fun) we’re going to test Google translate to see how accurate they are.

Current events in English: We’re in a show called the “Underground Cellist”. We’ll be performing at a theater called the Grass Candy Dish (because it’s shaped like one and it’s covered in beautiful grass).

Translated to German: Wir sind in einer Show namens der U-Bahn-Cellist. Wir werden an einem Theater namens Grass Bonbonniere Durchführung werden (weil es wie ein geformt ist und es ist in der schönen Gras bewachsen). 
Then I translated it to Greek, then Gujarati, then back to English. It popped out at the end as: We show you the name of a subway cellist. We favor the application of a grass called theater, such as an overgrown and located in the beautiful grass-like shape, will.

Not too bad, Google Translate. I couldn’t have translated it that well by myself.

Love,

Rita

Dear Annabelle,

            It’s Wednesday. Someone hacked your facebook and is texting me back from your phone. You’ll be so mad at him/her when you get home.

Love,

Rita

P.S.You’re home?!?!?!

P.P.S. You’re now going somewhere else? Don’t forget insect repellant This is so complicated.

P.P.P.S. I can’t handle that cooking spray lady. I really need to vent about this problem to you but YOU’RE NOT HERE.

Dear Annabelle,

            It’s Thursday. I have no friends because you’re lost in the wilderness. Please don’t get eaten by badgers or my life will be significantly harder.

            I’m adding Saver’s to our summer bucket list. What do you say?

Love,

Rita

Dear Annabelle,

            It’s Friday. I think you’re back but I have yet to see you. So I’ll pretend like you’re still gone so I don’t have to face the fact that I REALLY don’t have friends even though the badgers didn’t get you.

            Peach is in a show called “Jose and the Super Cool Pastel Cardigan”…or something. He was recently cast as Jose’s youngest brother, Benito. Let’s go see it. Summer bucket list.

Love,

Rita

Follow your heart. That's what Imad Fadhil would do.

Don't worry. Although we are excited for our adventures in the rest home, Annabelle and I aren't retired stalkers yet. While Annabelle was at an exciting rehearsal singing her heart out and playing her dream role, I went to the mall. By myself. That's right. Call me lame. It's okay. The life of a professional stalk&talker isn't always about glamor and popularity and I've accepted that.

While looking at guitars at the music store and listening to a guy play an unfamiliar song, I overheard an interesting conversation between the cashier and a customer. The customer was a middle-aged man with a guitar strapped on his back, a beard, and a terrorist-esque accent. He was asking about a flute and ended up buying a penny whistle. I followed him out of the store because I couldn't stand there and watch such a unique individual disappear forever (that's how you know you are a stalker at heart). This man--let's call him Imad Fadhil because I found that on a terrorist name generator--looked significantly out of place in the rest of the mall. It wasn't just the beard and the guitar that drew attention. It was mostly because he insisted on "playing" his new whistle. What was squeaking in the beginning soon turned into a "melody" that partially resembled Fiddler on the Roof. I proceeded to follow Imad Fadhil past Bath & Body Works and to the food court. Imad's musical talent drew stares and smiles.

Stalker Tip of the Day
Don't let someone special slip away.
Stalkee Tip of the Day

"Following someone you look up to is a good practice. Following your heart and having others follow in your footsteps is even better.” Follow your heart (like our friend Imad) and others may follow you.
Random Stalker Observation from the Mall
You can always tell which couples are married and which ones are dating at the mall. The married men roll their eyes and the hopeful ones listen intently to the women talking about the clothes they are trying on.

 Stalker News--THIS IS EXCITING!!

As of today, our blog has 3 views form a distant land called Germany. I hope they aren't self-conscious about our bathrobe comments. If you are German and/or are offended by the bathrobe post, please see Stalkee Tip of the Day, follow your heart, and send us an email at really.really.toeachhisown@gmail.com. We'd love to hear about your life/stalking adventures/latest fashion statement.

--Rita

Ice cream. Cold shoulder. Teen angst. Polygadate.

This week Annabelle and I decided to bring some ice cream to Peach to help speed his recovery. Our adventure wasn’t as awkward as we anticipated, in fact it was fun. He seemed glad to have visitors.

On the way there we did very slow doughnuts in the library parking lot and listened to a CD of songs about teen angst and laughed. It was pretty great. Really. And I learned that Annabelle has a talent for choosing ice cream flavors.

A couple of weeks ago we went to Peach’s school to see their musical. Polygadate? Of course. Germans in green bathrobes? Not this time.

On our adventure, Annabelle informed me that Green apparently thinks I’m giving him the cold shoulder. I don't know what makes him think that. I don’t really know how to handle that whole situation. Advice anyone?

Good news! We are sort of published authors.We wrote a one act. Not about suicide. Not about love. Not about teen angst. It's about pre-school! After we sent it to our "publisher" we took pictures of us holding giant books and looking sophisticated.

Well, that's my update. Annabelle, we have work to do. This post is rather pathetic for a blog that is supposed to be about stalking. In order to write about stalking, you have to stalk someone first. I sense a stalking adventure in the near future. (I would love to find that sentence in a fortune cookie someday.)

--Rita